And ...

Here's some stuff i wrote on my trip back to delhi from manipal ... its not great but ya its mine !!


Emptiness

Sitting by the window
Seeing the world around me pass in a flash
I see so much
Yet so little ...

There's something about these trees ...
These grey clouds
These people
This haze engulfing everything by its presence ...

They used to be one
To be joined by a common bond
But I have a feeling down within, thats its all gone ...

I feel as if these things are dead
Or their souls have been snatched from them
And their bodies left to rot in this constant emptiness ...

They are stuck in a place
Where they can not feel
Can't dream
Can't think
Can't believe
Can't be one again with each other ...

Stuck in this circle of doom
Where even those who are doomed
Don't know of its existence
And can't understand that their lives have been taken from them ...

But maybe ... just maybe every thing's alright
It's nothing on the outside
It's just my mind hallucinating
Tired of every day that it has to live with me ...

I'm suffering from a disease no one has a cure for
A lack of desire
A lack of passion
A lack of drive
A lack of love
A lack of understanding of what i want in life
Not being able to understand what it means to be human or even feel remotely human ...

I am a lack of everything
A body devoid of a soul
And this is why the world around me feels so empty and rotten
The only direction I flow is down
Down ...
Down ...
Down ...



Looking Out Of The Window

As I travel through this land
Where civilization dawned and kingdoms spawned
All I see is this emptiness ...

These fields which never end
I see them meeting the setting sun on the horizon
Feels like they have a story to tell ...

Some long forgotten war fought by brave warriors
The year when the monsoons decided to take a break
Forced separation of lovers by a world bent on hate ...

While I walk through this land I call my own
"My" ... Why do I call it mine ?
All I have done is taken ...

Eaten of her soil
Quenched my thirst with her waters
Clothed myself with her very essence
But I have come to understand
She will never be mine ...

Wherever I go
Whatever I become
I will always belong to her ...

All I want is the ability to give back
To be able to be the best I can be
That's the only way I imagine
I can give something back to her
My Mother
My Land ...