People are strange when you're a stranger,faces look ugly when you're alone.Women seem
wicked when you're unwanted ... eternal words spoken by Jim morrison . These lines,written
over 40 years ago, make so much sense to me as I deal with my life in this small Indian
town called Manipal.I was sent here in order to become an engineer but two and half years
down the line I feel evolved, with a better understanding of people and greater insight
into my own being.So here's to all the random people and nights I have seen in Manipal .
I was sitting on the ledge
At my friend's house
Looking at the sun setting in the horizon
Joining the waves caressing the land
Creating a masterpiece never seen before ...
Had a guitar held between my arms
Tunes lingering in my mind
But this guitar had only 3 strings
Which I thought I could use
To create a symphony unknown ...
As my thoughts wondered across the sky
Staring at the clouds and the colours
The yellows ... The pinks and The blues
Reminding me of the girl I met the night before
She sat beside me
Asked me what I could afford to pay for her soul ...
Kiss me ... Oh just kiss me she said
We're all alone and our hearts are sick she added on
The alcohol fueled heart had to be blamed
A girl like this was just too good for me
Whatever I may now say ...
Her hair smelt of wild flowers
Eyes reminding me of the stars up in the sky
Lips I couldnt resist kissing
Slowly but surely we blended into each other ...
We sat there all night
Talking about how life had been so unfair
Watching the rain fall down at a distance
Eventually giving into the primal urge ...
The sense of her touch
The dream of being in love
The gaze of her eyes
And the sighs coming out from her insides ...
Nights like these lead to days we'll rather forget
I don't want to touch you
I just want to be by your side
Just the thought of having you near my
Is enough to keep me happy for eternity ...
But the world keeps on rolling
She had to leave
Complete the work she had earmarked for that day ...
Left all alone
Walking the same path
I had come to call my own
The path meant only for the ones without love
Love is an illusion
And trust is something that you don't give to anyone
Cause you can only believe in youself and no one else ...
Don't care about women anymore
Never really cared about the sex
Always wanted something that meant more
Probably that's why I'm always left unsatisfied ...
Searching for things that no man is meant to have
Is like living in a fool's paradise
I'll just be a fool all my life
A smoke on my lips and a bottle of wine at my side
Are things that remind me of the moments
I spent with random succubus-es
On those cold dark rainy nights ...
About Me
- Metal
- I think the highest and lowest points are the important ones. Anything else is just...in between. I want the freedom to try everything
September 10, 2008
May 28, 2008
Octavium Mir
"You're obliged to pretend respect for people and institutions you think absurd. You live attached in a cowardly fashion to moral and social conventions you despise, condemn, and know lack all foundation. It is that permanent contradiction between your ideas and desires and all the dead formalities and vain pretenses of your civilization which makes you sad, troubled and unbalanced. In that intolerable conflict you lose all joy of life and all feeling of personality, because at every moment they suppress and restrain and check the free play of your powers. That's the poisoned and mortal wound of the civilized world."
Octave Mirbeau
Octave Mirbeau
May 24, 2008
My own grave ?
Walking through this life everyday and not being able to find something to belong to ... something which remains constant and makes me believe !
Just makes me wish that i had the strength to walk up and dig my own grave !
Smoking a cigarette
Smoking 3
Smoking a pack everyday
But cancer can't catch me is what my heart says ...
Been injecting myself with this venom
Since so long that i cant even remember when i started ?
Rashes and bloody eyes are my only companions on those empty nights ...
Does my body run on alcohol or blood is something i can't really say
Just one more drink before i sleep ...
It's better to burn out than to fade away
Riding at 100 and didnt really care
About that truck coming my way
That moment of contact is maybe that made it all real ...
Picking up that gun
And fighting my way through the enemy
That's the right way to die
Is something our leaders teach us everyday ...
I'll quit this life when i think i've seen enough
This isn't an affair
It's more like a fling
This life doesn't mean a thing to me, i swear
I dig that grave every moment that i breathe ... And these people help me with my needs !!!
Just makes me wish that i had the strength to walk up and dig my own grave !
Smoking a cigarette
Smoking 3
Smoking a pack everyday
But cancer can't catch me is what my heart says ...
Been injecting myself with this venom
Since so long that i cant even remember when i started ?
Rashes and bloody eyes are my only companions on those empty nights ...
Does my body run on alcohol or blood is something i can't really say
Just one more drink before i sleep ...
It's better to burn out than to fade away
Riding at 100 and didnt really care
About that truck coming my way
That moment of contact is maybe that made it all real ...
Picking up that gun
And fighting my way through the enemy
That's the right way to die
Is something our leaders teach us everyday ...
I'll quit this life when i think i've seen enough
This isn't an affair
It's more like a fling
This life doesn't mean a thing to me, i swear
I dig that grave every moment that i breathe ... And these people help me with my needs !!!
May 23, 2008
May 19, 2008
Buddha
Was stumbling through a lot of pages today and i found something interesting to share so here it goes ...
If you do not find an intelligent companion, a wise and well-behaved person going the same way as yourself, then go on your way alone, like a king abandoning a conquered kingdom, or like a great elephant in the deep forest. - Buddha
Made a lot of sense to me ... I hope it helps out someone out there ... Peace
If you do not find an intelligent companion, a wise and well-behaved person going the same way as yourself, then go on your way alone, like a king abandoning a conquered kingdom, or like a great elephant in the deep forest. - Buddha
Made a lot of sense to me ... I hope it helps out someone out there ... Peace
The Box
I was caught at the break of dawn
In a town with no tomorrow
Was sitting by the side of the road
When this cop came and stopped his chevy next to me ...
Name and details
He shouted in my face
The way he looked at me
I can never forget it, even till this day ...
Before I could say something
Try to explain to him my situation
He grabbed his gun
And pointed it in my face ...
Fuck you is all I uttered
Hit him in the balls
And took the gun away
Took a deep breath
Used the gun to open up his pretty face ...
I looked up at the sky
Shouted in disgust
Cause for a second there I could feel his pain
The jack rabbits surrounded me
Dragged me to a higher authority...
The court was set
While the cameras rolled
Mentally sick I was thought to be
A correctional facility was my home to be ...
All that they gave me
Was this 6x6 box
To spend all eternity ...
Scratching the walls
And hearing all those screams
Trying to be some one else
And failing miserably
Are things that I'll always have in common
With the world outside
I'm the man in the box
But you're in one too
You have this box that your senses gave you
And i'm stuck in this one that was gifted to me ...
Sorrow
Pain
Anger
and Disdain ...
There are thoughts in my mind
That I can never explain ...
In a town with no tomorrow
Was sitting by the side of the road
When this cop came and stopped his chevy next to me ...
Name and details
He shouted in my face
The way he looked at me
I can never forget it, even till this day ...
Before I could say something
Try to explain to him my situation
He grabbed his gun
And pointed it in my face ...
Fuck you is all I uttered
Hit him in the balls
And took the gun away
Took a deep breath
Used the gun to open up his pretty face ...
I looked up at the sky
Shouted in disgust
Cause for a second there I could feel his pain
The jack rabbits surrounded me
Dragged me to a higher authority...
The court was set
While the cameras rolled
Mentally sick I was thought to be
A correctional facility was my home to be ...
All that they gave me
Was this 6x6 box
To spend all eternity ...
Scratching the walls
And hearing all those screams
Trying to be some one else
And failing miserably
Are things that I'll always have in common
With the world outside
I'm the man in the box
But you're in one too
You have this box that your senses gave you
And i'm stuck in this one that was gifted to me ...
Sorrow
Pain
Anger
and Disdain ...
There are thoughts in my mind
That I can never explain ...
21
Turned 21 last week and apart from the initial euphoria of being able to drink anywhere in India legally and also the ability to get married to any person of the opposite sex i choose and who maybe out of her mind to make such a decision ... I dont really feel anything
21 for me was a very important landmark since a long time ... always figured that by the time i reached this age i would be mostly sure about where i was going and what i was doing in life ... to be able to guide myself to a certain goal and have something in my mind about what i wanted to do about my life and all the uncertainites that were unresolved in my head !
I've been spending most of my days ever since wondering about what's been missing from life ... about where i went wrong ? when and where will i get the answers to my questions? or maybe i've just been thinking too much ... there is no answer ... there is no question ... everything is just unrelated and 21 is just a number or is it !
The only time i find some measure of peace is when i'm lying down in the grass in the valley and staring up at the sky ! watching the clouds roll past these infinite planes lighted by the gentle rays of the moon ... watching how the stars make patterns in the sky and how the clouds and the celestial bodies team up to show me a glimpse of the future and the past at the same time ! The night sky for me is a guide to all the answers a person may ever ask or even think of ! Drinking a beer and smoking a cig ... having a little floyd to listen to just makes the experience even better ! things i'm gonna miss when i get back to delhi ...
A lot's been going on recently ... This is about how some people are leaving manipal for good and they're never coming back (graduating is simpler word use)! We started out as friends ... became something more than that ... fought ... bitched ... and cried ! But when it's time to say goodbye its better to let go of that ego ... do the right thing ... see each other one last time ... shake hands and move on ... the end of an era i'll like to add !
Random thought - Whats with the skyrocketing oil prices ? Has the highest production level of oil actually been achieved and is the supply of oil only going to go down now ? The price of a barrel of oil has increased 6 times in the last 6 years ! Gotta do with a variety of other factors like ... tensions in the middle east ... saudi arabia not increasing it production ... china needing more diesel due to the earthquake and the olympics this year ... investment in oil bonds by companies like goldman sachs and all ... random analysts making crazy claims ... what's the world coming to ?
Ok back to 21 ... turning 21 didnt make me feel any different! i still am what i am ... maybe i just wanted to feel a different way about life and love ... get a different perspective ... learn something new ... but i guess i'll just have to wait ! lazy and impatient at the same time doesnt really make a good combination !
what do i want for my birthday ... well to start with ... happiness and health for family and frens ... world peace (or atleast something close to that ... free oil !!!) ... a greater understanding of this world and its people ... wanna read more talk less and listen to more good music ... free booze and discounted cigarettes ...
these are one of my favourite things !!!
anyways enough ranting for now ... tc ppl peace
p.s : a little love might help ... you know
21 for me was a very important landmark since a long time ... always figured that by the time i reached this age i would be mostly sure about where i was going and what i was doing in life ... to be able to guide myself to a certain goal and have something in my mind about what i wanted to do about my life and all the uncertainites that were unresolved in my head !
I've been spending most of my days ever since wondering about what's been missing from life ... about where i went wrong ? when and where will i get the answers to my questions? or maybe i've just been thinking too much ... there is no answer ... there is no question ... everything is just unrelated and 21 is just a number or is it !
The only time i find some measure of peace is when i'm lying down in the grass in the valley and staring up at the sky ! watching the clouds roll past these infinite planes lighted by the gentle rays of the moon ... watching how the stars make patterns in the sky and how the clouds and the celestial bodies team up to show me a glimpse of the future and the past at the same time ! The night sky for me is a guide to all the answers a person may ever ask or even think of ! Drinking a beer and smoking a cig ... having a little floyd to listen to just makes the experience even better ! things i'm gonna miss when i get back to delhi ...
A lot's been going on recently ... This is about how some people are leaving manipal for good and they're never coming back (graduating is simpler word use)! We started out as friends ... became something more than that ... fought ... bitched ... and cried ! But when it's time to say goodbye its better to let go of that ego ... do the right thing ... see each other one last time ... shake hands and move on ... the end of an era i'll like to add !
Random thought - Whats with the skyrocketing oil prices ? Has the highest production level of oil actually been achieved and is the supply of oil only going to go down now ? The price of a barrel of oil has increased 6 times in the last 6 years ! Gotta do with a variety of other factors like ... tensions in the middle east ... saudi arabia not increasing it production ... china needing more diesel due to the earthquake and the olympics this year ... investment in oil bonds by companies like goldman sachs and all ... random analysts making crazy claims ... what's the world coming to ?
Ok back to 21 ... turning 21 didnt make me feel any different! i still am what i am ... maybe i just wanted to feel a different way about life and love ... get a different perspective ... learn something new ... but i guess i'll just have to wait ! lazy and impatient at the same time doesnt really make a good combination !
what do i want for my birthday ... well to start with ... happiness and health for family and frens ... world peace (or atleast something close to that ... free oil !!!) ... a greater understanding of this world and its people ... wanna read more talk less and listen to more good music ... free booze and discounted cigarettes ...
these are one of my favourite things !!!
anyways enough ranting for now ... tc ppl peace
p.s : a little love might help ... you know
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